.......so.......
We got lots of catching up to get on with. Last weekend was FUN beyond all belief. Alcohol+Weed+Pete's pool table = me having lots of fun and making an ass out of myself, and getting introuble with steve
But we're good for now.
But friday, im gonna try and get drunk, but still be home at like 10. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA lets see how that goes....
cause Saturday i got class and another photo shoot so i dont really want to be dead and puking and fat. Speaking of which my diet is working...BACKWARDS...hahah nah, its good. Atkins RULZ! i mean, if you like not eating carbs and sugar.....
and today i had a mongo panic attack in the student parking lot this morning and my dad just like shoved me out of the car saying he doesnt want to deal with my shit, and BELIEVE me.. i dont want him to have to deal with my shit, but i just didnt want everyone in the fucking parking lot to look at me. GOD DAMNIT I HATE WHEN PEOPLE LOOK AT ME...thats why im having such a hard time with steve. I cant do the whole, someone cares about me shtick. Not easy for Jules. BUt anyway, So i called Jon and i was scared SHITLESS to call him..but i did and he was like... "Jules, do me a favor, call your mom" so i did after many minutes of consideration and trying to make myself calm down and like pretend i had a stomach ache, but i called her and just burst. So after her yelling at me and me yelling at her, we went on an adventure up to Troy, New York to pick my brother up at RPI. 3 hour drive there. 3 hour drive there. Silence. the whole way. I sat on my labtop and watched Futurama and Simpsons. And everytime i tried to talk my mom popped a valium in my mouth so i was fucking gone by the time we got home. I passed out for like 4 hours. it was nice. but now, i think im gonna either go have a cigarette, kill myself, call jon, call steve, or talk to my brother. Only 3 sound they're gonna happen. 1, 2, or 5.
WHY AM I SO FUCKING MEAN????
wait, please dont answer that....
im gonna go rearrange my membrane.
(jules)